Abu Sa’eed Al-Khudri reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “There are two qualities which are not found in the believer: miserliness and bad character.” [Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi]
They say, a house is not a home without a mother.This much is true. Papa thought that houses magically transformed into homes without the man having to contribute anything to it. Emotionally, physically and financially.
As Nani would say, Papa was a 'downright kanjoos (miser)' in many a sense.He'd buy the groceries, yes and occasionally he would take us clothes shopping. Everything other than that was considered a luxury. It wasn't as if he didn't have the money. He did. The cafe we had was doing relatively well and Mama wasn't the least demanding.
If anything Mama was actually afraid to ask him for anything. If you knew my Papa, you would be to.
I think when God was distributing conscience, Papa was still asleep. It wasn't that he didn't care he simply didn't think.
He didn't think that Mama might need an allowance for her own personal needs, or that cardboard boxes wouldn't suffice as make believe cupboards in the real world.
He didn't think that Mama might have likes of her own, or preferences that differed from his. He delegated and everybody else had to succumb to his will.
You see, Mama was the settler. For her, marriage was a commitment you make without questioning. She thought maintaining silence was the right thing to do, the wifely thing to do.
When they were courting, Papa would phone her for hours on end. He would speak, she'd listened. We always joked that Papa would have made an ideal lecturer. Disagree with him on any topic he was discussing and you would never here the end of it.
Papa would place a microphone in your grave if he had to but he would never let you go without hearing him out.
In Guantanamo bay, this could be used as a form of torture. Even the Penitentiary's electric chair would be considered mild a punishment in comparison.
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